Posts Tagged ‘ Paresh Ganatra ’

Bol Bachchan

Bol Bachchan
Release Date: July 6, 2012
Directed by: Rohit Shetty
Cast: Ajay Devgn, Abhishek Bachchan, Asin, Prachi Desai, Asrani, Krushna Abhishek, Archana Puran Singh, Neeraj Vora

I knew this film was a take on Hrishikesh Mukherjee’s Gol Maal. But I went in to discover what’s new or rather what’s screwed up. Gol Maal has been used and the derivative plot has been inherited from another film, Chor Machaye Shor, which was also a take on the aforementioned classic.

Ajay Devgn is getting into the skin of a hamming hamster with his each ‘home production’ and he gets into the non-emotive, muscle flexing character, Prithviirrelevantlongname pehelwaan with an age-old rivalry with his cousin, another ridiculouslylongnamed guy. Did I mention there’s a guy uncannily similar to Sabu – Chacha Choudhary’s accomplice – and coincidentally he’s also named ‘Sabu’. How creatively liberating! A tale of lies is spun by Abbas (Abhishek Bachchan) to raise a livelihood. Trust me, you won’t even sympathize with any of the characters even after a ‘financial calamity’ strikes Abbas and his sister, Sania (Asin)

Prachi Desai gets to play the filler, smile-flashing, stupid lovestruck Radhika. There’s no reason why she gets involved in a romantic angle with Bachchan and you are not even expected to question it, or else, Rohit Shetty might topple a Mahindra Scorpio on you. Or he could put you into a Mahindra Scorpio and make it go through a truck and then make you topple.

P.S. Mahindra Scorpio has in no way offered me any kind of endorsement deal, as of yet. Though I’m not sure about Rohit Shetty.

The self-proclaimed  modern day messiah of ‘family entertainment’ laces the narrative with double entendres, mild expletives and inappropriate hand gestures, and the families applaud! Yet, the protagonists shy out of saying the word ‘homosexual’ or samlaingik and prefer to whisper it into ears, with the melodiously irritating loud background noise. Not just once, but twice, or maybe thrice.

You are expected to laugh at a used and shamelessly copied plot, and even plagiarized characterizations. One particular sequence where Rohit Shetty plays out his another fetish, the urge to watch big, burly men making homosexual poses with Abhishek Bachchan, while old and new hit Hindi numbers play in the background. The humor is as forced as the romantic angles or the car-chasing scenes or the entire movie itself. Ajay Devgn’s schtick, where he makes use of wrong English words to concoct a ‘funny’ phrase is as old as Anil Kapoor’s Bhaiyya ji in Tashan. Yes, I just mentioned Tashan.

The ladies don’t have much to do, except for Archana Puran Singh’s loud Zohra Bai and Asin’s disturbingly differentiating breast size. The men either do their parts badly, or they go overboard. There’s no middle ground perhaps. Abhishek Bachchan, Ajay Devgn, Krushna Abhishek and Neeraj Vora even commit the blasphemy of hamming up scenes from the underplayed & subtle Gol Maal.

This isn’t a tribute, it’s a murder of the original Gol Maal and Chor Machaye Shor. If you’re going in for the senior Bachchan, then you’ll get a reason to walk out right at the start when Amitabh Bachchan burps out that he isn’t in the film and only his name is used. Now only if he could have told us that in the TV promos as well.

My rating: * (1 out of 5)

Rowdy Rathore Review


Rowdy Rathore
Release Date: June 1, 2012
Directed by: Prabhu Deva
Cast: Akshay Kumar, Sonakshi Sinha, Paresh Ganatra,  Yashpal Sharma, Gurdeep Kohli.

The only way I could do justice to the film is by writing my review in rainbow colored font accompanied by jarring underlying sounds that could potentially cause bleeding from your ears. A mishmash collection of things from the ’90s that you’d like to forget (yes, a never-ending Kumar Sanu wedding song) along with a lofty, uninspiring plot is what this film is.

I’m trying to figure out what actually happened during the production meetings held between the makers.

Suit 1: Prabhu Deva sir, we all liked Wanted very much. Any chance of doing something similar with a different actor?
Suit 2: (Interferes) Everyone liked Singham as well, hope you can possibly incorporate some stuff from that.
Prabhu Deva: It must be in Hindi, right?
Suits unanimously: Yes, why else will we even convene a meeting!
Prabhu: Alright, I’m gonna take this film more down-South. We’ll have a lot of belly-button fixated shots. Long shots, close-ups. Doesn’t matter. But lots of stomach. Stomach is the new cleavage.
Suit 1: What about item numbers? Do you know any inexpensive alternatives to the mainstream heroines for that?
Prabhu: Reality show winner? Okay? Will add to the mass appeal.
Suit 2: Anything you say, sir. Keep it austere.
Prabhu: Fixed then. Let’s flip a coin now.
Suit 1: Sir, flipping the coin for deciding the tone of the film, or the cast?
Prabhu: What are you high on? I meant to do that about the script.
Suit 2: Oh, never mind, sir. We’ll just flip the coin about everything. So, when do I send over the check?
Prabhu: Let’s flip a coin for that as well.
Suits collectively laugh and walk into the sunset.

If you don’t get any of that, I’ll sum it up. The first half is as terrible as watching a cat trying to brush its teeth. The second half is your any South Indian masala movie-catalyzed with some 90’s moronic Bollywood trash. There are a few laughs & a rare item number with THREE superbly moving women (special mention to them, Mumaith Khan, Shakti Mohan and Maryam Zakaria) none of the performances are unforgettable. Entertaining in bits and pieces.

My rating: ** (2 out of 5) 

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